Praise God Rhys is Okay!

from Oct. 4, 2017 

I got a call from Rhys Wednesday night/Thursday morning 2-2:30am. My app didn't give a name and the number looked familiar so I answered but didn't say anything, never know when it's a telemarketer. The line disconnected so I went searching for who's number it was and verified it was Rhys. I call back... 3 times.... the 3rd time he answered I heard paramedics asking him questions and him responding lucidly. OH NO Paramedics!! WOOHOO he's answering lucidly.

Long story short, he goes to the ER just in case and has no broken bones. Left elbow is pretty bruised and left knee is scraped up, but he's okay and most importantly no head injury. I am so fortunate that God has provided us family in the Muncie area. I was able to tell Rhys not to worry I would have someone meet him at the hospital. I had several people I could call, I called Gina because I know they have a close connection since he rents a room from her and I know she's got a flexible-ish life right now. She of course dropped everything and went to the hospital and stayed with him the entire time and brought him home.

Rhys is okay. Rhys is dealing with realizing he could have died. He's in pain, but he's okay. He wasn't alone. He isn't alone.

Chaz and I are still dealing with it. Still head reeling. Still wrestling. I don't have a we struggled and here's the way its all pretty in a bow. I've discovered some ugly truths about myself and some deep lies I'm believing. I'm wrestling.

The lies: my sons need me the most; if I was in Muncie this wouldn't have happened; I'm a terrible mother for leaving my sons to go to Mongolia, clearly I must not love them.

The ugly: if this had been a fatal accident I would have been at risk of flipping God off and leaving here. I realized I have a condition on being here. It's not okay. It's sin. For me to look at God and say I will stay in Mongolia and do what you've asked of me so long as you protect my sons from fatal harm is sin. There may be more to those conditions in my heart, I haven't explored further. This was enough of a revelation to recognize I need to repent and to allow Jesus to change what he will in me.

I'm devastated to not be next to my Rhys right now. We are devastated to not be next to our Rhys right now. I'm overwhelmed at the emotions flooding my heart at the "what if's". I'm too distracted to accomplish my work and praying for peace and focus for both of us.

If you're near Rhys please hug him for each of us (watch the elbow though!). If you're far, feel free to call him and just say hi, tell him he matters to you. It helps to hear that when you're struggling with "Woah, I just had a close one" and you are still single.

Love you all,

Thanks for reading.

Jean