The Pearl, the Church, Suffering and Rejoicing

About a month ago, in church, we read the passage, "Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant in search of fine pearls, who, on finding one pearl of great value, went and sold all that he had and bought it.” - Matthew 13:45-46

In the parable I have always understood the merchant is Jesus and the pearl is the church. The kingdom of heaven is like Christ searching for fine pearls and finds the Church and Christ gave up everything to have it. He gave up continuous communion with the Father to become human, be tempted, tortured and murdered for us, the Church. Thinking about the analogy, what I came to realize, was the significance of pearls over precious stones and metals. Diamonds and rubies and other stones are cut from rock and shaped by human hands. Gold, silver and other metals are pulled from the ground, melted and shaped by human hands. Pearls are different. They are created deep under the ocean and hidden within an oyster. We take no part in the shaping of the pearl. It is God that has created and shaped the precious pearl. Also, consider how the pearl is created. Pearls are created through suffering. An irritant works its way inside the oyster. The soft flesh of the oyster is damaged and hurt therefore must coat the irritant with a substance called nacre. Nacre is what gives pearls the strong iridescent luster. The oyster continuously coats the irritant with nacre because it is suffering and it is its only defense. This process of creating a pearl takes years.

Our Pastor had asked a question that he had wanted answered by the congregation. Two microphones were set up in the aisles so everyone could hear the answers. I do not remember what the question even was, yet nearly everyone that stood up and answered, talked about the suffering they have endured over the last year. Some of the responses I was aware of. Some completely shocked me. I had no idea of the amount of suffering happening here. As people gave their answers for the next 30 minutes, I talked to God about what I would say and should I say anything. 

What I thought about that it has been a little over a year now that we left Mongolia, presumably for good. It has left me in a state of grief and sorrow, and anger and rage. I have recently started “trauma” counseling which had been recommended by the C&MA based on my psychological evaluation. Since starting the counseling, it has left me raw and tender. Sobbing at the slightest offense or for no reason at all. The only way for me to pull out of it, has been to turn to rage. However that is not a viable solution. Like shifting gears in a car, I try to stay in neutral instead of downshifting to sorrow, or up to anger. On top of that, I applied for a job that i really wanted and was excited about, but was turned down for similar reasons I was turned down by the C&MA. More sorrow and anger.

While I was thinking about this, a young mother stood up and talked about her battle with cancer. She remarked about the passage in Romans 5:3, “Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings,...” She then said that she found it difficult to rejoice in her suffering. She did not want to rejoice in her suffering. In my thoughts, I agreed. I do not rejoice in my suffering. I hate my suffering. I want my cup to pass. I am done with it. If there is a lesson to learn in it, I will pass, thank you very much. However, I went to the passage she spoke of and read it the section in its entirety. What I found was that it does not say I rejoice in my suffering, it says we rejoice in our sufferings. 

As I listened to every painful story, suffering with cancer, worst nightmares coming true, personal struggles with sin, and the loss of loved ones, I began to see what the passage meant. Every one of us have suffered or are currently suffering and we are still here. We are not retreating from this community. We are a family that carries each others burdens. (Galatians 6:2) We carry each other's burdens in the laying of hands, anointing with oil, and interceding in prayer. We sit quietly and listen without offering advice, we hold each other through tears, we watch each others children, or offer to make a meal for their family. In that, I can rejoice. In that wonderful work of faith, I find joy in our suffering. 

Again, in the analogy, the Church is the Pearl. We are the pearl that Christ seeks. Christ has sold all He has and purchased this one pearl which He holds dear above all else. We had no hand in creating the Church, but God the Father has created it and matured it over the years through layer upon layer of suffering. Christ rejoices in our suffering, not because He is some kind of sadistic uncaring lord, but because when we are bearing each other’s burdens, when we are ministering to each other, our focus is on Him and not ourselves. We become like Him, the personification of love.

Before that verse in Romans it says, “and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God.” The hope of the glory of God is the deliverance from this earthly shell into glorified bodies in His presence. In that no more illness, no more tears, no more sin. Just eternal rejoicing in God’s glory. I long for that day when I go home. In that I find hope and can rejoice as well. We do not rejoice individually, we rejoice corporately. 

Romans 5:3 goes on to say, “...because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”

What does God do for us? How does He make the Church? Our suffering produces perseverance. Perseverance, is having the courage to stay, and the strength to not leave when that would be so much easier. 
Character, is maturity to lead others, the experience to grant compassion on those behind you, the knowledge to look to those ahead of you. 
Hope, He is hope of eternal life. Hope where shame cannot exist. 
Love, back to love. God’s love in us, through us, to all.

It is not easy to rejoice in suffering. It has been over a month since I recognized the bitterness I am feeling and I am still not rejoicing in it. However, I do rejoice in OUR collective suffering. I do this by focusing on the image of Christ finding that beautiful pearl and cradling it like an infant found abandoned in the woods. That child has suffered, but He rocks us to sleep, comforts our frail body and loves us in our suffering.